
Stardust Story: He Boss...I Like That
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Hi there, Galactic Stars!
Let’s hop aboard my cosmic time machine and blast back in time.
My Story: A Cosmic Journey to Understanding
I remember calling my dad and telling him I had changed my pronouns. After that call, I sent him a book to read: A Quick & Easy Guide to They/Them Pronouns by Archie Bongiovanni & Tristan Jimerson. I thought it would help us have a better conversation once he had some additional information. He had a lot of questions, with comments ranging from curious to outright baffling:
- “But that’s not grammatically correct.”
- “Can I still call you partner?” (This is a childhood nickname we share, and funny enough, it’s already pretty gender-neutral!)
- “Why is this a thing now?”
- “What if someone identifies as a cat?” (Yes, you read that right. Cue the “huh?” cat meme for full effect.)
Source Tenor
My initial reaction was a mix of bewilderment and exasperation. Part of me wanted to scream, “First, we’re getting our wires crossed here. Second, if someone identifies as a cat, just respect their choice and use the terms they ask for. It’s not that hard!” My brain struggled to process why such a simple act of respect can feel monumental to others.
But instead of reacting emotionally, I paused. I took a lot (A LOT) of deep breaths and tried to explain things in a way he could understand. I realized this was a moment to build a bridge, not a wall. And that’s what I’ve been trying to do, one conversation at a time.
Breaking It Down: Pronouns and Social Constructs
Sometimes, helping people understand starts with revisiting the basics.
What Is a Pronoun?
According to Merriam-Webster, a pronoun is “a word that is used instead of a noun or noun phrase. Pronouns refer to either a noun that has already been mentioned or to a noun that does not need to be named specifically.” Pronouns are nothing new. We use them every day without thinking twice: she, he, it, they, you.
What Is a Social Construct?
Many aspects of our daily lives are based on social constructs, shared understandings created by societies over time. Think about money, traditions, or even gender roles. We collectively agree on what these things mean and how they function.
So, let’s connect the dots:
- Pronouns like "he" and "she" were socially accepted long ago.
- The introduction of new pronouns, like singular "they," isn’t so different from how language has evolved historically.
- Imagine a time if "he" didn’t exist and people only used "she." Introducing "he" would have felt new, strange, even uncomfortable. Change always does. But language adapts, and so do we.
Respect First: The "What If Someone Identifies as a Cat?" Question
When my dad brought up the hypothetical “What if someone identifies as a cat?” scenario, I had to pause. Part of me wanted to scream, because THIS is what we’re focusing on? But instead, I took a deep breath and broke it down:
- Respect Comes First: If someone identifies as a cat (or any identity), our first job as humans is to respect them. It’s not about understanding every detail of someone’s identity; it’s about treating people with dignity. If they have preferred pronouns, use them.
- Empathy and Perspective: If a child pretends to be a cat, you’re not going to crush their imagination, right? If an adult truly identifies that way, they’re not asking you to change who you are, just to meet them where they are.
After addressing his questions, I turned the conversation back to him to encourage personal engagement rather than hypothetical debates. He responded with, “I hear what you’re saying about the book,” and…that was it. Hard sigh. Sometimes, you have to leave things be and trust that understanding will grow over time.
“He Boss… I Like That”
Toward the end of our conversation, I told my dad I was starting my business. I shared how Galactic Flow is all about personalization and creating space for everyone to identify and connect. I said, “You’re a ‘he boss,’” and he replied with a smile, “I like that.”
That small exchange was a powerful reminder: anyone can be a boss. They Boss, He Boss, She Boss, Xie Boss, Qui Boss. Being a boss is about stepping up, listening, and learning. It’s about connecting and treating people with respect.
Little does my dad know but I plan to get him a Personalized Boss Stainless Steel Tumbler as a gift :).
Embracing Change, One Star at a Time
Here’s to being bosses in our own lives, embracing change, and showing up for the people we love. Because at the end of the day, it’s not about perfect grammar or hypotheticals, it’s about kindness, growth, and the light that connects us all.
How are you stepping into your “boss” energy? Share your story with the Galactic Flow community, and let’s build a universe where everyone shines.
Source Imgflip for original image
With Grace and Stardust,
Kassidy
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Sources:
Merlin, i (2023) Huh cat huh M4rtin Gif - Huh Cat huh m4rtin huh - discover & share gifs, Tenor. Available at: https://tenor.com/view/huh-cat-huh-m4rtin-huh-huh-meme-what-cat-gif-27377993 (Accessed: 17 December 2024).
X, X everywhere meme template (2016) Imgflip. Available at: https://imgflip.com/memetemplate/X-X-Everywhere (Accessed: 17 December 2024).